Egypt

Tonight, I led a study on Numbers 11, focusing on the pagan bounty of Egypt that the Israelites desired and cried out for, and the manna that God so graciously provided each day "with the dew."

At this point, the Israelites have been freed from Egypt, but "the rabble" have begun to complain and cry out for the food they used to eat when they were in slavery. As I studied and prepared for this lesson, one phrase screamed off the page at me, so much so that I went to look in other translations, just to make sure it really said that:

"We remember the fish we ate in Egypt at no cost—also the cucumbers, melons, leeks, onions and garlic."

- Numbers 11:5 -

 I found myself talking back to the page, incredulous...

"AT NO COST?! Really? You were in SLAVERY! It cost you your life and freedom!"

And, as one of the women in my small group wisely pointed out, the only reason slaves are fed at all is to keep them just healthy enough to continue the work of the slave owner...

But, if I'm honest with myself, I've done the same thing that I gasp incredulously at the Israelites for doing... How many times have I looked back at my life before I accepted Christ, or even periods of my life after I accepted Christ but was still living in sin, and said "I really miss _____..." or "I miss the days when _____..."- too many times to count!  How quick we are to label the old life of bondage to sin as having been "free" or "at no cost."

A sister in Christ told me about Sara Groves song "Painting Pictures of Egypt", and its been on my mind and heart for my small group and myself this week- she describes so well what it looks like for us to do the same thing the Israelites did:

I’ve been painting pictures of Egypt
Leaving out what it lacked
The future seems so hard
And I want to go back
But the places that used to fit me
Cannot hold the things I've learned
And those roads closed off to me
While my back was turned

The past is so tangible
I know it by heart
Familiar things are never easy to discard
I was dying for some freedom
But now I hesitate to go
Caught between the promise
And the things I know

The Israelites desire the food of Egypt because it is familiar and known and because the complaints of "the rabble" infect the camp and incite evil desire in their hearts for what they once had. They begin to wax poetic about the leeks and the garlic and the melons, to "paint pictures" of Egypt as a wonderful place, when in reality it was the land of their enslavement, where their days were filled with harsh labor and food that was only meant to keep them enslaved. Likewise, we desire the people and lifestyles and "perks" of sin that we once had- we miss companionship of friends who weren't good for us, or the "security" of the pursuit of the American dream and the version of it that we had.

I feel, more than ever, that "the places that used to fit me cannot hold the things I've learned", and I pray that my memories would be clear- that I wouldn't paint pictures of my Egypt, because the manna, the bread of life, Jesus Christ, beckons me every day, with the dew of the morning- and His gift of grace and mercy is truly "at no cost" to those who would eat of it.